being alone. She wrote to John, "I wish from my heart you had made a
stand in Newburyport last Autumn. There is now a young Doctor there,
doing very well, where I am sure you might have done better."56
Louisa described her dreams in her diary; many of them were about John.
She missed his company, and her letters and diary indicate that they
were an intellectually compatible pair, but she also missed his presence
and hinted at the physicality of their relationship in her descriptions
of her dreams:
He threw himself on the bed and groaned;
I begged to know what was the matter. Said he, Louisa, come to my
arms; when I have you in my bosom I shall be happy. I flew, and in
that close embrace I lived an age, and drank such draughts as burst
my soul, and called me to my solitary chamber. Behold it was a dream!
I would that my life were all such a dream. O my beloved husband–
thou best of men; from whom I derive all my happiness in this world,
and with whom I hope to enjoy Eternity.... ...Last night, I dreamed
of reading a charming letter from my husband–and after that, of being
with him and kissing him heartily.
When possible Louisa deferred to her husband in matters that concerned
Warren, and when not possible, she protested. She was sure that her
husband's presence in their home was necessary for Warren's moral development.
In spite of the commonly held belief that the mother's morality was
the key to the moral development of children, Louisa wrote, "Should
he return and have it in his power to live with us, then shall [Warren]
receive such lessons of right and wrong as shall preserve him from evil."
She was sure that many of Warren's minor illnesses, such as earaches
and difficulties with teething, were worse because of his father's